Published by Self-Published on July 25th 2016
Genres: Contemporary Romance
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Keane Morgan wouldn’t return any of my calls or texts, and I was pissed as hell about it. I didn’t want to drive from Seattle to L.A. with the guy any more than he wanted to drive with me, but I had no frickin’ choice in the matter--at least, not if I wanted to use his brother Dax’s coveted parking spot at UCLA.
Okay, so it turned out Keane was objectively gorgeous, and, fine, pretty funny, too. But did he have to be so damned in love with himself? I mean, jeez, the cocky way he flashed those dimples was just so orchestrated. And, honestly, what kind of guy uses the phrase “baby doll” with a straight face? Oh, that’s right: the kind of guy who’s a male stripper.
Yup, the cocky jerk turned out to be Seattle’s answer to Magic Mike, a stripper known as “Ball Peen Hammer”--which meant Keane Morgan was emphatically not the kind of guy I’d ever fall for.
Not. At. All.
No freakin’ way.
Well, until Keane convinced me to fall for him, that is.
Which I did.
Ok I’m trying to think of how to write my review. BPH was a lot to process and I mean A LOT! I had a love/hate, hate to love relationship with this book. The first 1/4 of the book I thought for sure I was going to throw my kindle through the wall brah and DNF it. That’s how pissed off Peenie made me. But hang with me and it because it totally changed my mind.
Ball Peen Hammer is so freaking arrogant and cocky that I felt like I needed a shower to wash off all his cockiness before I threw up. I was wishing that someone would put him out of his handsome and happy delusional life. I really thought his momma dropped him on his head. That’s how much bullshit he was talking and believed. Then something happened, Maddy happened. Instead of BPH, we started seeing Keane. Then I started to understand why he needed his alter-ego. Why he was so on All. The. Time. Maddy bought out the best in him and he the best in her. Then he became stupid again and I hated him all over. Hence the hate to love part.
I absolutely love Maddy! She’s so adorbsicle! Her relationship with her sister is much like mine with my sister. Funny and relaxed but instead of (the older sister) being overprotective, it’s my little sister that is. Maddy is much more of the adult in this book. But when she’s with Keane I feel like I’m reading a book about Lucy and Ethel. That’s what they remind me of. She’s so down to earth and I think they bring the best out of each other. I must say the sex is HOT!! Holy hell!!
I normally don’t write about side characters but I have to give a shout out to Z (Zander). I loved the glimpses we seen of him. He’s freaking hysterical and I can only wish that Lauren will write a book about him! I need more Z!
Linda! Listen, Listen! I. Need. More. Z. Linda.
Despite Ball Peen Hammer irritating the hell out of me at first, it redeemed itself for me. I think Lauren knew what she was doing by writing Keane’s character. Once you get past the irritating, obnoxious, cocky, arrogant, know it all sex god, there’s actually a good man with a heart of gold under there brah.
Ball Peen Hammer is more than a book about a stripper but it’s about a girl and boy who are looking for two different things but end up wanting the same in the end. If you love romantic comedies with hot sex, laugh out loud moments and simply just a really great book then you have to read Ball Peen Hammer. This is my first book by Lauren Rowe and it won’t be my last.
It’s hard to put my emotions into words, but I shall endeavor to do my best. I gotta say…this book really made me angry. It was like two warring sides in my head: I was really hating Keane for the vast majority of the book for his base personality but I was also in love with the Maddy and their interactions.
Maddy is moving in with her sister in LA to go to UCLA to start her junior year of college. She is studying film and has had some success already with some of her documentaries at her previous school. Dax lives across the hall from Maddy’s sister and wants to do a favor for the sister. He calls his brother Keane and asks him to drive down with Maddy. Keane is a stripper and a manwhore. He is also arrogant, egotistical, and basically thinks he is gods gift to women. He claims that women just throw themselves at him. On their road trip, they very quickly become really great friends.
So, my disdain for Keane was strong and actually lasted the entire book. It eased a little for a spell but stayed strong until the end. I didn’t feel that his negative character traits actually changed any or that he LEARNED anything. Sure, there is a love story, so the learned to open his heart. But he still thinks he is sent from the heavens for women…just this one woman now. It was very off-putting for me. While other areas of his character grew, this part didn’t and this was the worst part of him and why I ultimately didn’t care for most of the story. Maddy, on the other hand, was great. I loved her character. I loved their banter. However, there was a heavy use of the word brah. That was rough after a while.
The love story is very natural. I really love friends to lovers romances and this one was great. The alternating POVs allowed us to read the thoughts of both characters.
Overall, I would give this 4 stars. I had a hard time with the character Keane, but I liked the banter and storyline!
Amazon US: http://amzn.to/2a5ezvc
Amazon UK: http://amzn.to/29XGgau
As they exchange information, I make my way to the end of my aisle and loop into theirs, not taking my eyes off Baby Face the whole time. Shit. This dude’s hunting Maddy so hard, it’s making my blood boil. Jesus, he’s going full-throttle rifle on Maddy’s ass right now, completely foregoing his crossbow altogether.
When I reach the two of them in the middle of their aisle, I shuffle past the dude and stand next to Maddy, shoulder to shoulder, and then, on a sudden impulse, put my arm around her shoulders and squeeze her tight, making her wobble in place at the unexpected jolt to her balance. “Hey, sis,” I say, squeezing her like a rag doll. “You totally fell down on your candy-acquiring duties.”
“I know. I’m sorry.” She subtly wiggles out of my grasp. “Brian and I got into this hilarious argument about the best candy bar of all- time, and—”
“And I’m totally right,” Brian says, cutting her off, and they both chuckle at some inside joke.
“No, I’m totally right,” Maddy corrects.
Brian smiles at her. “I’ll actually be down in L.A. in a month. How ’bout I call you then?”
“Nice to meet you, man,” Brian says, looking at me. He nods but doesn’t put out his hand.
I nod back.
Brian strolls away, buys a Snickers bar and a can of Red Bull, and leaves with a little wave to Maddy.
The minute he’s out the door, Maddy takes a giant step away from me, her face etched with annoyance. “What was that?” she asks.
“That weird thing you just did?”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
Maddy puts on an exaggerated scowl, like she’s Hulk Hogan eying an opponent. “’Hey, Brian,’” she says in a low voice, clearly intending to imitate me but sounding more like Arnold Schwarzenegger imitating Maddy imitating me. “’I’m Maddy Milliken’s bodyguard and I’m going to beat you the hell up now,’” she adds.
“What are you talking about?” I say, chuckling.
Maddy pauses, assessing me, and finally shrugs. “Nothing. I guess I imagined it.”
“Your weird… I dunno… vibe.”
“Oh, well, yeah. I was worried about you.”
“Worried about me? I was standing in a minimart, buying candy. Pretty low-risk activity, I’d say.”
“Uh, you absolutely were not standing in a minimart, buying candy—you totally fell down on that job, dude. You were standing in a minimart, getting picked up by a douche. And second of all—”
Shit. What the fuck am I doing? I’ve got to stop this shit right now. “Don’t get riled up, baby doll,” I say in my most soothing voice. “All I’m saying is you took so damned long in here, I started thinking maybe the store was getting robbed or you’d fallen into the toilet or something.”
Maddy twists her mouth. “Brian didn’t seem the least bit douchey to me.”
I shrug. “What gave you the impression he’s a douche?”
“Just a figure of speech. So are you gonna do the job I hired you to do or not?” I motion to the candy rack. “‘Cause based on your performance thus far, you’re totally fired.”
“And I wasn’t getting ‘picked up,’” Maddy says, her tone full of indignation. “Brian’s brother goes to UCLA. Can’t I talk to a helpful, nice guy without it being some sort of a sleazy pick-up?”
“Sure you can. However, in this instance, you were talking to a helpful, nice guy who was picking you up so he can bone the living fuck outta ya.”
“Keane.” Maddy’s cheeks burst with color. “Don’t say that. Oh my god. You’re insane. Brian was just being helpful, that’s all.”
“Yeah, so he can bone the living fuck outta ya.”
“Stop saying that. Please. It’s offensive and absolutely not true. This topic of conversation is officially over.”